Costa Ricans are welcoming, and they are also more formal and more indirect than most newcomers expect. The mistakes foreigners make here are rarely rudeness — they are usually directness, informality, or impatience deployed with the best of intentions.
Here is what actually matters.
Greetings
Never skip the greeting. Walking up and starting with your request — even politely — reads as rude. Lead with buenos días, buenas tardes, buenas noches, or the all-purpose buenas.
- Handshake — firm, with eye contact — is the default in business and between men who do not know each other.
- The cheek kiss (un beso) is one kiss, right cheek only — not two, as in Spain. Used woman to woman and woman to man in social settings.
- Men greet men with a handshake, or a one-armed abrazo among friends. Never a kiss.
Usted, vos, and never tú
This is the most distinctive thing about Costa Rican Spanish and the easiest place to mark yourself out.
Costa Rica is an ustedeo country. A 2022 study of 132 native speakers found usted dominates almost every relationship — with parents (71–100% of respondents), siblings, spouses, colleagues and friends. Costa Ricans use usted where most Latin Americans would use tú, including with children and with pets.
Vos is the intimate, solidarity form, and it is recognised as culturally Costa Rican — one participant in that study called it “the essence of the culture.” But its use is narrow and regionally variable, and it is earned rather than assumed.
Tú is essentially absent and actively disliked. Respondents described it as “not normal” and even “a cultural disgrace,” associating it with foreigners or affectation. Ironically, the signage in upscale and foreign-owned businesses uses it constantly.
Practical rule: default to usted, always. You will never give offence. Do not attempt vos until you have close friends who use it with you. Never use tú.
Pura vida
It is not a slogan, it is a working phrase. It means hello, goodbye, thanks, you’re welcome, no problem, I’m fine, and general agreement. The answer to ¿Cómo está? is very often pura vida.
Foreigners over-deploy it — printing it on everything and treating it as a lifestyle brand — which Ticos find mildly comic. Say it casually, not solemnly.
Hora tica
Social arrivals run fifteen minutes to an hour or more late. This is not rudeness; it is relationship priority over schedule.
The exceptions matter: buses, airlines, cinemas, Caja medical appointments (where people queue absurdly early), and formal business meetings. You should be on time even when your counterpart is not, and visibly showing irritation about the delay is a worse offence than the delay.
Ticos are early risers — up before six, in bed by nine or ten.
Quedar bien, and why “yes” often is not yes
This is the concept that explains most cross-cultural friction here.
Quedar bien means leaving a good impression and not causing anyone discomfort — including by delivering unwelcome news. The consequences run right through daily life:
- A polite “yes” is often not agreement.
- Tal vez, quizás, quién sabe, Dios primero, vamos a ver — or simply not returning your call — are the actual refusals.
- Someone who does not know the directions may well give you directions anyway, rather than disappoint you.
Criticism must be delivered privately and gently. Public correction damages a relationship permanently. Ticos are sometimes described as icebergs — the visible portion is small — and confrontation is avoided at almost any cost.
The adjustment for a newcomer is learning to hear a soft no, and learning to give one.
Tipping
By law, restaurants add 10% servicio plus 13% IVA to the bill — so a menu price becomes roughly 23% more at the till. The 10% goes to the establishment, not necessarily to your server as a discretionary tip.
Ticos generally do not tip on top. In tourist areas, an additional 5–10% for good service is now expected and is real income for staff.
- Guides: around $10 per guest per day, more for small groups
- Drivers: $2–5 per passenger, or 5–10% of longer fares
- Hotel housekeeping: $5–10 per night
- Taxis: rounding up is normal; a full tip is not expected
Colones and US dollars are both accepted. Two failure modes to avoid: tipping nothing because “servicio is included,” and tipping 20% on top, which distorts local norms.
Dress
Ticos dress up, and dressing badly is noticed.
Men rarely wear shorts outside beach towns — in San José, shorts on an adult man identify you as a tourist instantly. Women commonly wear jeans with heels and full makeup for ordinary errands. Business dress is conservative and formal.
Beachwear stays at the beach. No bare chests or bikini tops in shops and restaurants.
Conversation
Avoid abortion, premarital sex, same-sex marriage and religion with people you do not know well. Costa Rica is majority Catholic with traditional social norms across much of the country.
Do not criticise Costa Rica — even mildly, and even if a Tico does so first. That is their prerogative, not yours.
Avoid sarcasm and teasing banter. What a North American reads as friendly ribbing lands badly here.
Comparisons to Nicaragua, and remarks about Nicaraguan immigrants, touch a live political nerve.
And do not call yourself “American.” Say estadounidense, or “from the United States.” Everyone in the hemisphere is American.
Business
- Schedule roughly two weeks ahead. Arrive on time.
- Spend real time on small talk first — family, football, the weather. Going straight to the agenda is a mistake.
- Exchange business cards with the Spanish side facing up.
- Use Señor or Señora plus the paternal surname. Costa Ricans carry two surnames, father’s then mother’s, and the first is the one you use. Professional titles — Licenciado, Ingeniero, Doctor — are taken seriously.
- Decisions are made by senior people after consultation, so expect several meetings.
- Aggressive closing tactics and visible impatience read as weakness and bad manners.
- Avoid scheduling around Christmas and New Year, Semana Santa, and Carnaval.
Hosting and being hosted
Bring something to a home invitation — good wine, chocolates, something from your own country. Wrap it. Gifts are usually opened in front of you.
Do not give Costa Rican coffee or local fruit as a gift. It reads as thoughtless.
Meals are unhurried, and leaving straight after eating is abrupt. Expect a cafecito mid-afternoon. Personal space is closer than North Americans are used to — proximity in queues and on buses is normal and nobody apologises for it.
Gender and street harassment
Traditional gender roles persist alongside real progress. Women’s professional presence has risen substantially, and Costa Rica has had a female president — Laura Chinchilla, 2010 to 2014.
Catcalling remains common in some settings and is still sometimes framed locally as complimentary. However, since 2020 Costa Rica has a law against street sexual harassment (Ley contra el Acoso Sexual Callejero), carrying penalties of six months to three years’ imprisonment plus fines for conduct including public exhibitionism, following or cornering, and non-consensual filming — with heavier penalties where the victim is a minor, over 65, or disabled.
Foreign women should expect more verbal attention than at home. The standard local response is to ignore it entirely.
The mistakes foreigners make most
- Calling yourself “American”
- Using tú
- Being direct — stating a complaint plainly, saying no flatly, correcting someone in public
- Taking a “yes” literally
- Assuming English
- Expecting punctuality, and showing irritation when it does not arrive
- Shorts and flip-flops in a bank or a Central Valley restaurant
- Complaining about Costa Rica to Costa Ricans
- Skipping the greeting
- Assuming pedestrian right of way — in practice, you have none
- Slamming car doors, which is considered crude
The underlying principle
Almost all of it reduces to one idea: the relationship comes before the transaction, and nobody should be made uncomfortable in public. Greet before you ask. Soften before you refuse. Correct in private. Be late gracefully and never be annoyed about it out loud.
Get that right and the rest follows.
Settling in properly
Learning the culture takes time. Getting your legal status right should not. CRIE — Costa Rica Immigration Experts handles residency applications, renewals and citizenship for people relocating to Costa Rica.
See the residency options in Costa Rica, or get in touch.
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